Teaching My Kid About The Supreme Court's Decision To Legalize Gay Marriage

It's been a particularly challenging couple of weeks, dealing with both intolerant and unfair folks, but woke up to the victorious news that gay marriage has been legalized in all 50 states. Finally. Something to be happy about.

I wanted to share this exciting news and educate my 3-year-old on what this means for her and generations of today. I started with a rainbow, which she was more than excited to draw. (See below :>)

I explained marriage to her as two people wanting to be together because they love each other so much and because they want to be a team. (We talk about teams a lot and family, in particular, acting together as a team.) That marriage is usually between a boy and a girl but sometimes a girl wants to marry a girl, and a boy wants to marry a boy. Then, she wanted to read her Big Hero 6 book. So, we took a break from the topic.

Later in the day, I brought up the subject again, telling her today is a day to celebrate because anyone can marry whoever they want, whoever they love, boy or girl. A boy can marry a girl, a boy can marry a boy, and a girl can marry a girl.

She responded: 'I want to marry a boy! I want to marry Harper because I love Harper. Then we can live together and be a team.'

This is just the beginning. My daughter now knows she can marry whoever she wants, no matter what gender. And the fact that she now has a choice will continue to be celebrated.

It's never too early to start teaching our kids, our future, about acceptance, tolerance, equality, and any other topic that will instill values in them to make this world a better place. I'm a firm believer of that. xo #piecesofm

Farmers' Market Discovery Walk!

Nui Nui was just learning about fruits and vegetables the week before going to this farmer's market. Her teacher said she could identify all the fruits and vegetables they covered that week with one exception: eggplant. Well, she found the eggplant that day. 'It's purple!'.

When I taught nutrition to kids, I never imagined what it'd be like to teach a kid of my own. It's an amazing feeling— all my own.

How To Brush Teeth With A Toddler [VIDEO]

It's called a toothbrush, not a 'bite-brush' - something I always find myself saying.

How To Apologize, When To Forgive [HEALTHYBUTJUICY]

Republished from HealthyButJuicy.com.



I wanted to post this photo and give it a beautiful caption, like 'Blissful way to end the long weekend'. And it was, but that's only half the truth.

The real truth is that, yes, this was what the end of what our long weekend looked like— settled, calm, happy, loving, and together in a booth at a somewhat fancy, somewhat pricey (for us) restaurant— but it took a storm to get here.

My daughter is 2 years old, nearing three. Her 'terrible twos' days are numbered— I know, I've heard, three's are actually worse but I am in complete denial about it. I have to give her credit, though, because with me she's only had maybe one... ok, two, major public tantrums.

The first was in Trader Joes. She needed to go to the bathroom (bad) but we didn't have her toilet seat and she went hysterical, too afraid to use the 'big' toilet as is. She ended up peeing in her pants, which made the hysteria that much more amplified.

The second time was in the car at her school's parking lot. Maybe no one saw it (I'm hoping, but I'd again be in denial to really think that). She wanted to go back into the school to wash her hands, as I had asked when we were in there, but it was late and I wanted needed to hit the road because traffic was already bad and we have a long commute home.

This most recent time (yesterday) happened in the swimming pool. We were at the pool for a good 2 hours— I was going to limit the time to less than that because I was exhausted when we did that last time but that obviously didn't work. Nearing on hour 2, another family came to swim. We had seen and played with them last time, so knew they were good company. Shortly after, two other families came. It was like a party. I had just spent 2 hours carrying her back and forth in the pool, 'swimming', and my only child all of a sudden was at a pool party with kids all somewhat around her age.

But it was really time for us to go. We stayed another half hour and then I put my foot down, or tried to at least. All I can say is that she really wasn't ready to go. She let me know that, the other families, along with the whole neighborhood.

I always worry about times like these, where I am filled with insecurity and self-doubt. Am I a bad parent? What will these people think of me? Will I be reported? Yes, it goes that far. The media has done its job well— stories have successfully been sensationalized enough times and I, as a parent, have been sufficiently provoked. Thankfully, though, I'm pretty trained in self-talk as well, and can rationalize with myself that, that's ridiculous and I'm having idiotic thoughts.

When we got home and things settled down, was the time I took to talk to her, recap what happened, and teach her how to apologize for her actions. Previously, my method was three-pronged but, in between this latest hysteria and calm, I've made it four-. This is NOT something you should necessarily do with your child(ren) but this is what I did and will keep doing until I refine my parenting to do something else, hopefully better (more effective)?

First, I let her know she needs to apologize. Kids quickly learn and know when they've done something wrong, and when they need to do (or not do) something. As parents, we need to help them formally recognize these things by telling them direct. Their recognition skills are still underdeveloped. It's just like taking a shower. They know they need to do it but, still, they continuously need to be told for quite some time before they learn to actually do it themselves.

So she says sorry. But is sorry enough? That's a rhetorical question. I asked her why she was sorry. This is really important because just saying sorry is a cop-out— just saying sorry doesn't require her to think or reflect on anything. Asking why makes her think and learn to recognize the actual actions/behavior that warrants an apology. Hopefully, doing this enough times will sink in and she will be able to recognize the consequences of her behavior before she actually does anything.

Typically, then, after she says sorry and 'what for', I ask her if she's going to do it again, and if what she did is being good or naughty (translated from a different language). I do this sort of to summarize and drive home the message without dragging things on.

This time, however, I realized it would be good to add just one more piece to the apology: I asked her what can she do different for next time. I realized this was important because (clearly) she didn't know how to respond to something against her desires. In my original set of questions (arguably, a 'lesson'), she can recognize what she's done but, from there, doesn't learn how she can handle similar situations going forward. She obviously doesn't always know what she can do instead, so sharing some better options with her isn't 'cheating' by giving her the answers, but it can actually help her grow her 'good behavior vocabulary', so to speak.

Finally, I forgave her. I always do, once we've reached the end of the apology. This is actually what I consider one of the most important, if not the most important, steps of this apology process. Being able to forgive someone is an invaluable lesson to learn and skill to do. We gave each other a kiss and a hug, and said I Love You. Then, we kept on dancing.

Parenting can be tiring— after 2.5 hours in the pool, I was already drained— and challenging. But it can also be one of the most rewarding and strengthening things you ever do. My kid teaches me so much and continues to make me into the best version of myself... how's that for a sappy ending after all? :> 100% truth.

Below is a recap of how we apologize and when we forgive.

• Say sorry...
• Why are you sorry...?
• Is that naughty or nice?
• Will you do that again?
• What will you do different next time?
• Forgive: Kiss. Hug. I Love You. Keep on dancing.

How do you teach your kid(s) to apologize and forgive? Share in the Comments below, we'd love to hear! :>

How I Teach My Kid To Read - Stage 0?

Nui Nui still doesn't know how to hold a pencil/crayon properly. I need to do better working with her on that.

On the reading front, I've been teaching her how to read the first letter of words and associating sounds with letter. With that, she's been doing quite well, 'M' being the easiest (obviously) :>

This is how it goes: She got this sheet of Thomas and Friends and there's probably 30-40 trains with names and, for some reason, she loves identifying Thomas and all his friends, so she asks me 'What's that?'. I correct her and say, 'Who's that?' and proceed to ask her what the first letter is. I know she knows all the letters. If she doesn't read it, she's just being lazy. When she does, though, I ask her what sound the letter makes. She sometimes gets it, sometimes doesn't. Once established, I start saying words that start with the letter for her to make the connection with the sound and other words that start with the letter— trying to help her identify commonality (first letters) of words.

She's slowly becoming more confident in reading that first letter and getting better at associating sounds with letters and sometimes even coming up with a word with that letter too. Progress :>

These are a few of my favorite learning moments of this week :> [Pulled from my Vlogmas videos— check those out if you haven't already :>]



Any tips on learning how to read or hold a pencil?

Share in the Comments below, we'd love to hear! :> xoxo

Teaching A Toddler, OOTD, Beautiful Skies, School Artwork! - VLOGMAS 18, 2013

The Giving Tree By Shel Silverstein - Reading Together

Last week I introduced Nui Nui to Shel Silverstein. I wasn't really an avid reader when I was young but if I had to name some writers who got me interested, they would probably be Shel Silverstein, Roald Dahl, Dorothy Haas (author of the Peanut Butter & Jelly series), and Susan Saunders (author of the Sleepover Friends series).

For the past week or so it's been all about The Giving Tree, which I honestly never read before. (Where The Sidewalk Ends was my keeper). I had The Giving Tree, however, for a while now— from when I was in New York, in fact, but can't remember where I picked it up from. Now that I think about it, though, I'm pretty sure it was free and probably found somewhere amongst other books that someone didn't want and I remember thinking when I took it that I'd keep it for my future kid(s), knowing I'd want to share Silverstein's works with him/her.

Writing that now, knowing the hurdles it took to have a kid, I smile at the hard work paid off. How naive of me to think it was a necessarily a given, to some extent. :>

Anyway... This book is amazing. Period. And it might actually be my favorite one yet.

The picture-to-text ratio is perfect. Moreover, the life-lesson/edu-taining/learning factor is present. I have to say, I'm pretty sick of the majority of children's stories that don't really have a point. Perhaps they all do, stirring up some sort of imagination but I much prefer the learning element, whether it be in concept or reading skill.

The Giving Tree does both. It's a moving story about a boy [eventually a man] who takes and takes from the tree, who is ever so giving. She just keeps giving with hopes he'll just be happy, even when he's stripped her of everything [literally]. Her happiness is dependent on his. Like a mother.

As I mentioned, there weren't a lot of pictures, no colors, a lot of white space, but just enough drawing on each page to prompt her to ask a lot of questions. And on the first several reads, she did.

Also during those first reads, it was really interesting to see Nui Nui's reaction as she saw the tree down being torn down, little by little, by the boy. In her eyes, her eyebrows, and whole facial tension, you could see her concern.

After those initial readings and when she got to know the story better, we were then able to read together. This is what I call my mad-libs teaching method. I start saying something and have her work to finish whatever it is I am saying.

Examples included:
Alphabet:
A... b!
C... d!
E... f!

Numbers:
One... two!
Three... four!
Five... six!

Alphabet Song:
Now I... know my!
ABCs... next time!
Won't you... sing!
With... me!

Twinkle Twinkle:
Twinkle... Twinkle...!
Little... Star!

Days of the week:
Wednesday, Thursday... Friday!

And from the book:
And the boy loved... climbing up the tree!
and... eating apples!
and... playing hide-and-seek!

To give you an inside look, watch us read The Giving Tree together! :>




We're always looking for good books to read. If you have any recommendations...

Share them in the Comments below, we'd love to check them out! :> xoxo

School-Week Photos And Summaries Via Prezi :>

I've been getting a lot emails from Nui Nui's new school, which I am admittedly not used to. It's not that I can't handle a ton of email but.. I don't know what it is. I just don't get to all of them immediately and realized the significance so am slapping the back of my hand for it.

So! Nui Nui's school actually uses Prezi, which I am familiar with from my last job. Prezi is basically a schmancy presentation app that uses Flash and a ZUI (Zooming User Interface), which allows the motion of zoom in and out of different parts. Personally, I think it's nauseating to flip through (and I'm not the only one who thinks so) but I'm not complaining either.

So, what's cool about this new school is that they actively take pics of the kids, document what they did each day, and summarize it beautifully in a Prezi. How awesome is that? Now, I've heard of texting or emailing pics of the kids throughout the day or week at other schools but this is nice. Schmancy, even. I'm wondering if other schools do this— comment below if they do. If not, WHY DON'T THEY? I seriously have a deep-found respect for those that utilize technology to enhance the learning/educational experience. Seriously.

So here's the overview. The small circles are placements for the photos (which I didn't include).



And here's individual pics I pulled of Nui Nui.



So cool.

What cool things is your school doing?

Share in the Comments below, we'd LOVE to hear! :> xoxo

The Potty Training Diaries - First Attempt At Training Pants

I have so many posts I've been meaning to write this week. *sigh* //endcompaint :>

In summary, the major development this week is that we've been starting actual training pants with Nui Nui. Mom tried on Monday during the day and it was a disaster. She found a trail of wet and eventually found a puddle in my closet. Immediately, it was back to diapers. On Tuesday evening, however, I pulled out the training pants after our shower per Nui Nui's request. I think she likes it, to be honest. They probably are a lot more comfortable than diapers.



So I put them on after our shower. Took her to the bathroom before dinner (one hour later), her pants were dry, and she went— sticker! After dinner (one hour later), same thing— sticker! Before bed, same thing— sticker! But then diaper for over night. This happened Tuesday and Wednesday night. I was thinking, ok, I have this... I'll start her just at night and work my way throughout the day.

Tonight was a different story. It was the same up to the point of after dinner. She did earn a sticker after dinner but between that time and getting ready for bed, she just couldn't hold it, I guess. We were in the kitchen and all of a sudden Mom and I look down and Nui Nui is standing there with a stream coming down. Seriously, it looked as if she wasn't wearing pants, it was that fast. I immediately picked her up and told her to stop and ran her to the bathroom. I put her on the pot and she continued to do her duty. It was diaper thereafter.

Back to square one. Back to the drawing board. Honestly, though, my kid's poo and pee doesn't really bother me that much anymore. From the day they are born, day in and day out, it's constant and continual. Five, 10, however many times a day. And they're your kid. Whatever they produce is golden, right?

So anyway. I guess we'll try tomorrow. :>

Tips on potty training a toddler? Share below or Tweet me, we'd love to hear! :> :>